Jul 28, 2010

a sign

I have one song in my mind at the moment.

If a guy plays it for me with a guitar and matching vocals (doesn't have to be good), I WILL CERTAINLY MARRY THAT GUY.

Okay, so I am slightly insane because of the rain and these freakin' nursing stuff. But I am 'slightly' serious about this. HAHA. Sorry, I'm just having fantasies.

Jul 27, 2010


Jul 25, 2010

a slump

Since last week, I’ve been in a slump. No, wait, not only last week, but the week before that and the week before that…oh hell, life has really been difficult. I’ve been screwing up a lot of my major exams, and I haven’t been doing well at other things. I’ve been finding myself being easily annoyed by other people, and I frequently cry because of frustration. It’s like I’m a having a long period of PMS. I wish it’s just PMS, but it’s not. I’m in a terrible slump, and I badly need motivation. And that’s not my only problem.

I have personal problems and please don’t let me get started on it.

I’ve been tempted a lot of times already to do one evil thing that can hurt somebody else. But if it’s the only way I can be happy, so be it. Until now, I haven’t done that thing because, of course, it’s wrong, and either way there’s no certainty. I’m caught between a dream and a habit—if you know what I mean. Should I chase my long-time dream? Or stick to the habit that’s barely making me happy now. There’s too much at risk. I don’t think my ‘dream’ would want me still, nor do I believe anymore that my ‘habit’ is going to ‘change’ for me.

Please, give me a sign.