Aug 19, 2012

of dreams

I'm used to having weird dreams. By weird, I mean those dreams that go from frighteningly insane, like being chased down by a hoard of winged creatures or having your whole family turn into flesh-eating monsters, to something extremely out of character, like cheating on my partner. I'm definitely sure the latter is more unsettling. 

Ever since college, I have, occasionally, had dreams of being with or being romantically involved with guys who are not my boyfriend. Weird, I know. It's like my "dream" self is a slut who gets too antsy so she flirts with any guy she sees. My dreams would usually show me going on a date with other guys in the mall or in parks--nothing too intimate (Thank God). I started having these dreams again just this June. It started to bother me because it was always about this same guy. I think I had two or three dreams about that same guy last June. (Disclaimer: Never has this guy crossed my mind for ages!) I shared the dream with one of my roommates who, apparently, has some knowledge about this kind of stuff. And yes, she interpreted it for me. According to her, dreaming of such things somehow serves as a forecast of the future--the distant future, to be exact. While she was saying that, I suddenly started crying. I cried because I was pretty sure that I don't want to end up with anybody else but my current boyfriend. No past crush or flame can ever change how I feel about him, and I'm sure of that. When my roommate saw me crying, she said that it was very sweet of me to feel that way. She then told me that, maybe, it's different for all of us, or that dreams may not be as universal. I wish it really isn't.

Today, I woke up from another dream about a different guy, a guy who had a significant role in my past (emphasis on past). I dreamt, again, of cheating on my boyfriend. It felt very different, of course. Because, this time in my dream, I had enough conscience to turn the other guy down because of the love I feel for my boyfriend. I guess my dreams are there not to forecast the future, but to show me my "what if's" or the "what could have been's". Either way, my dreams only proved one thing--that I wouldn't have it any other way. I love the person I'm with. I'm enjoying every minute of being with him, and I'm glad that it's him I ended up with. With him, the future is clear--that I can see myself loving nobody but him for all of my life

4 comments:

Erine.♥ said...

Haha. I remember when you told us that dream! :))

It's okay, Joyce. Spending the rest if your life with someone is a choice. >:D<

Joyce said...

Awwww.Thank you, Erine!>:D<

Aina ♥ said...

Kinilig ako Ate omg. :"> /hides in her hidey hole

Joyce said...

Hahaha. Thanks,Aina. :))