Post-printing Frustrations

I've only just finished printing some of the visual aids I'd be using tomorrow for yet again another beautiful day in the community. Nah, that didn't sound right. Part of that sentence was true, though. It's definitely not the second half.

I'm starting to come to terms with a lot of things. First is with school. Yes, this is the semester that made me regret all the decisions I've ever made regarding my education. Of course, most of you might have read my rants in twitter or in facebook which somehow got my mother telling me to keep quiet about my negative vibes toward my university. Nonetheless, here I am STILL expressing how much I regret not choosing the road more often traveled. Mainly, I chose to be where I am now because most people tell me that it's the best, or maybe because I just wanted some challenge. But now that I think of it, I chose it for the bragging rights (yeah, baby. triple quota!).

Second is with...well, just guess.

I've always feared the unknown. That's why I love making plans or preparing ahead of schedule. I'm a dreamer, too. I always think of what will happen to me someday. Who I'll be ending up with, or in what type of house I'll be living in, and even how many children I'd like to have. The problem is, I'm dreaming alone. I've only just realized it now that when it comes to thinking of the future, I'm always alone. It's either the other person involved evades the topic or because the person involved ignores what I say regarding the future. Sad, I know. And it's making me think, really. It's making me think whether that person really wants to be part of my future. I think it's also my mistake. I've always been too serious about him. I guess I should tone it down a bit. Maybe I should just stop being so pushy about it and just start withdrawing.

I guess, for now, I'll be making plans for myself...only.